Why Your Next Meeting Needs a Bouncer
Farm Bureau meeting. Pie Town, New Mexico by Russell Lee
Meetings are a fact of life. And for most of us, they fill a significant part of our working days. In fact, when done well, they are the magic that makes our organizations succeed. So why do we put more thought into our lunch order than planning these crucial gatherings?
In one of my favorite books, "The Art of Gathering," Priya Parker suggests that every gathering needs a bouncer - not a tattoo-covered giant that checks IDs at the door, but something equally forceful: a clear purpose.
While I’m not suggesting you hire security for your next Teams call, there's a simple way to put this idea into practice: POP. A handy mnemonic developed by Facilitation First, POP stands for Purpose, Outcomes, and Process. Put another way: why are you gathering, what are you trying to accomplish, and how will you achieve it?
Amazingly, when asked, most of us cannot answer these questions for any of the neatly stacked squares taking up real estate on our already over-booked calendars. Let's change that.
“When we don’t examine the deeper assumptions behind why we gather, we end up skipping too quickly to replicating old, staid formats of gathering. And we forgo the possibility of creating something memorable, even transformative.
— Priya Parker, The Art of Gathering
Your Velvet Rope: Purpose
Like any exclusive venue, your meeting (yes, even that weekly stand-up or quarterly finance call) needs standards. A clear purpose helps you decide who’s invited and what’s on the setlist.
Tip: your purpose should be specific enough to guide decisions but open enough to allow real discussion.
What You Came For: Outcomes
Just like a great night out, every meeting should offer a “promised experience":
Decisions made
Plans created
Solutions chosen
That feeling when everyone finally gets it
The energy of true alignment
The momentum of a clear path forward
Running the Show: Process
Here's where the magic happens - this is how you orchestrate the experience to deliver on your promised outcomes. It includes a structured flow and some House Rules, such as expectations around participation and agreed-upon norms for interaction. Feel like overkill for a routine check-in? Not if you've ever endured that dead silence after 'Any questions?' where you can hear everyone mentally planning their escape while pretending to take notes.
Put It Into Practice
For Meeting Hosts: Before you send that next invite, know exactly what kind of meeting you're running. Let your purpose be your bouncer, your outcomes be your promise, and your process be your game plan. Better yet, include this information in your email or calendar invite, and you’ll be the best host in town (or at least in your company).
For Guests: Unclear invite? Ask questions. You might save everyone from another soul-crushing Zoom call where people stare at their phones for an hour as someone drones through 47 PowerPoint slides featuring 12-point font.
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